I want to follow Meg at A Practical Wedding (darn California weddings!) and her "creative.thrifty.sane." vibe. Particularly most of what she said in this post. At this moment, what I want is for people to have fun. I want the wedding to be about what Mr. MA and I want. However, somebody being not forthcoming about what he wants, I get to fantasize a little. So this is the wedding that I want. I want the long tables and simple centerpieces. I want all of our friends and family in attendance. I want to order cheap food and a lot of it. I want people to dance. I want to dance. I want to not care if somebody ruins my veil or spills on my dress. I want to have fun.
I want to not throw a massive expensive party in light of the economy, but I also don't want to have a wedding I don't want to look back and hate. I don't want to have to set the tables myself. I don't want to worry about chargers. What the hell are chargers anyway? I don't care about the "tablescape." So far, my favorite "centerpieces" is a long table with rose petals down the middle and votive candles. I think it would probably cost about $100 total to pull that off.
I don't want to become the bridezilla that my fiance is terrified I will become. I don't want to hear the word "bridezilla" at all in the planning process. Telling the fiance's ex-girlfriend she can't be a groomsman? Not a bridezilla thing. Wanting to do a running of the brides? Not a bridezilla thing. Being upset that at least 4 other friends of mine will probably get married within the same 2-4 month period and all of our friends will be sick of going to weddings and come to mine out of obligation? Not a bridezilla thing. Wanting to wait to pick bridesmaids to know I'm really sure? Not a bridezilla thing.
I want trees and woods. I want great views. I think I want a tent. I want a Unitarian minister and our friends and family to be involved in the ceremony. I want ice cream. I don't really care if the cake is good, as long as we don't pay a ton of money for an overpriced cake. I want a vegetarian wedding. I'm sorry, but I do. I know that's gonna be the first thing to go, but I would love to have it. I want a photobooth. I want a wedding that feels like a night off instead of a whole lot of work.
Eventually this process will shift from what I want to what we want. This will happen slowly, and I hope with as much sanity as possible and very little fighting or compromising what we really want now, because I do think we want pretty much the same things.