See, I wish we had a backyard where we could do this.
And how great would it be to make all of our own food at the grill after the ceremony and party down with our closest friends and family?
Unfortunately, the backyard of my parent's house won't support this.
Mr. M-A's parent's backyard is our fallback if we can't find a venue, but I don't really think any of us really want to embrace that option - they have about an acre, including a swimming pool which I guess we could float flowers and candles in...except that its above ground so there's no guarantee anybody would see it.
The important thing to remember is that we have to have the wedding that works for us, not the wedding that works for the crafty DIY-couple or the thrifty-vintage couple or the backwoods West Virginia couple. I look at other people's weddings and I find myself wishing that I was cool enough to have the wedding that they have.
If I cared less about my friends, or family, I think we could do the intimate backyard wedding. But I have a big family, and I love all of them. (With two possible exceptions.) I want them to be there for this day. If we had a backyard wedding, I couldn't invite them all. Or we couldn't have dancing. So my wedding envy must end at the point where I remind myself that as nice as their wedding is, I just can't do it. We can't make all the food ourselves and we can't repave part of the backyard to give people a space to eat.
So it all comes down to what you take as inspiration from other people's weddings, without bitterness. I can't have the beer bottles hanging out in a big galvanized aluminum tub, but I want the long tables with the runners and the candles. I can't have the simple garden wedding, but I want the sunshine that they have as they party down. The more I think about it, the more I want a daytime wedding that doesn't run later than 9 or 10pm, leaving plenty of time for our guests to make their own after-party or hit the bar at the restaurant after we've gone.
It is okay to want what somebody else has, as long as you don't spend your whole wedding thinking about how you didn't get what you wanted.