Our engagement party is starting to overwhelm me - there will be close to 75 people there!
Oh, people with small families - I envy you sometimes! My local family adds up really quickly, between my aunts, uncles, cousins, their kids, our second cousins, etc. Then there are our friends from college, all of whom are dating people or married, and we are now friends with their significant others.
We couldn't keep our wedding at 75-80 guests even if we wanted to. Our engagement party? The only members of Mark's family coming are his parents and sister.
There is one huge guilt complex I have over the wedding guest list and that is my friends from high school. I know that I'm inviting three of them. The other 7? I don't know. I've kept in touch with a few of them. Some of them annoy me now (not you, high school friend reading the blog, it's the other ones). And I don't go home that often to see them, but I'm close enough to home that nobody has felt the need to make an effort to keep in touch. The ones I'm still close with are mostly the ones that left town.
Since getting engaged, I've been a worse friend. I've been avoiding them, because I don't want to answer wedding questions. I've had a couple other friends ask "am I invited to your wedding?" and fortunately the answer has been yes for those people. And I'm seeing them on Saturday, so what do I say when asked? "We're keeping it small" is a total lie, so I'm not saying it. Saying, "unfortunately, because our families are enormous, there isn't a lot of room for friends so we are mostly inviting only our close mutual friends" is a little less of a lie, and is in fact mostly true. Is that offensive or will they understand that because they don't know Mark very well (they've met a few times), they aren't on the list?