Monday, February 22, 2010

Why I'm a HUGE hypocrite.

So remember all my "I don't need a bouquet" and "I'm gonna DIY the flowers" and "I'm gonna make fabric flowers?" tripe?  Well...I'm contacting florists for rates. I'm meeting with one today. 
Long story short, during a test run, I stabbed myself with floral wire and turned to Mark and said, "I do not want to feel this way on my wedding day."

Oh, wait, you don't come to the blog for the short story.  You come here for the long story in all it's anguishy goodness.
Over the summer, we booked Irvine and cut our flower budget to $500.  I know how much flowers cost, so I knew this meant DIYing flowers.  However, I also thought about it and decided a bouquet was totally unnecessary, because I wouldn't really be holding it except in a few pictures. 
Then I started to have second thoughts about my dress.  One of my big issues with my dress is its basque waist.  I'm just not wild about it.  Then I was looking at a friend's pictures, and realized her dress had a basque waist, but in the pictures, she's holding her bouquet at waist level.  Problem. Solved.
Once I decided that my bouquet would be in photographs, I realized I didn't want it to a craft project.  Which is how my fabric flowers are coming out.  (I will finish them to use as a tosser, don't worry.)  I was also having second thoughts about the fabric flowers because I wasn't happy with the way they were coming out and they weren't really jibing with the vision that I had.
I realize they look okay, but they aren't really what I had in mind.
So then, I went to Cross Street and picked up some Asters, some roses, and some hypericum.  And a gerbera daisy.  Cuz I love gerberas.  Well, it looked terrible.  It took forever to strip all the leaves off, even with florists scissors, I couldn't get the length of the stems right, etc.
Finally I attempted to just use the asters and the hypericum, which looked pretty good, especially if I had bought two colors of asters.  But what I was realizing was that I don't really want to do the work.  Especially not on our wedding weekend, in which I would like for the priority for where we spend our time to be with our guests and not with my floral sheers.
My best attempt. Probably okay for a bridesmaids bouquet, I wanted more fullness and wished I had just bought a second thing of asters instead of roses.

Then I attempted to make a boutonniere, stabbed myself in the finger, and began to bleed.  Then I began researching florists.  I also put up an ad on Bride$hare to see if there was anybody who would like to trade days with me, and emailed a couple of friends getting married. One florist got back to me to let me know that she doesn't do Sunday weddings.  The other set up with a meeting for this afternoon. 

This, my friends, is what we in the Sane Wedding Biz call, "throwing money at the problem."  Sure, you could call it hypocrisy, but I just call it what it is.  We're all guilty of it, and this is why Mark and I left a lot of room in our budget for unexpected hiccups and give-ups and hypocrisy.  We're lucky that we are able to do this, and I don't think I would have a problem DIYing bouquets other than my decision to emphasize mine in the photographs.  I felt guilty as I paged through the weddingbee gallery, finding great DIY bouquets and thinking "why would I spend money on this when other brides make it look so cheap and easy?"  But I just have to remind myself that it is not worth it to me to stress over this. 

What problems are you throwing money at?


  1. We really took a pretty low-stress route thus far (we're getting married in august), but I would say we probably overspent on the reception venue (hotel). It really wasn't ideal, but it was nice, and with 90% of our guests being out of towners, being at a hotel, not worrying about a shuttle, or drinking and driving, or anything was just plain easier than trying to force our outdoor barbeque dreams in the middle of a city. Turns out, since they take care of many other extras, we've crossed even more off our list with virtually no effort.

  2. You poor thing making yourself bleed!

    We tried to do WAY TOO much ourselves. I WISH we had thrown money at a whole heap of problems. You are wiser than I!

  3. what about instead of fresh flowers using succulents? you can do them all way beforehand?

    i also read a blog post somewhere about DIY flowers and how to do them way in advance.

    or what about an online floral site (like pro flowers i think)...they do wedding flowers and ship them to you. If you're not a crazy psycho control freak that might be a great way to go.

    and turns out...i'm throwing money at most problems....just because the idea of interviewing vendor after vendor to get the best deal seems ill advised to me...when we find someone we like that's even close to budget we just book em and chaulk it up to piece of mind and trusting our vendors on the day of. wedding zen.