Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Vain much?

I recently purchased a dress that I might potentially use for a TTD session.  (disclamer: it was $20 and if it works and I don't ruin it, I will donate it to BABC)  Mark said, "I don't get it." I said, "I don't expect you to.  It's a silly, nacissistic thing that I can do because I'm getting married."

I read a somewhat disturbing board post on Weddingbee recently where a girl posted that she was talking about how she wanted to buy a cheap dress for a TTD session, and her fiance didn't understand.  Then he added some choice words, including, "you're not a model so stop acting like one!" Although the fiance's reaction might have been unnecessarily harsh, I would have received a similar reaction if I had um, asked first before deciding to do one.

Some people really like having their picture taken.  But because we are told that this is narcissistic and vain, we don't admit it.  Instead, we talk about wanting great photography to "remember the day" and "capture the moments" and while that is often true, we never say, "I will be in the best shape of my life and have spent a small fortune on hair and makeup and I want those pictures so I can make a giant poster of us to hang over our fireplace."

Why do I want to do a TTD session?  I dunno, really.  I love photography, and very early on, I had this dream of ding a TTD session with me in a canoe at the reservoir near Mark's parent's house.  It just seems, like engagement pictures, like an opportunity to get creative.  We get an engagement session with our photographer, and since Mark doesn't really want to use it (although he reluctantly agreed) I though, hmm, well, maybe I could do bridal portraits or TTD session.  Then, once I had the idea, I couldn't let it go.

Some people don't like having their picture taken.  I'm not one of them, especially not lately.  A huge factor in that is that I used to be heavier, and pictures made me feel embarrassed and made me feel badly about my body.  Since losing weight, lifting more, and running, I feel so much stronger and more powerful now and even though I don't always take a good picture, I really do like to have my picture taken now.  I love looking at pictures and thinking, "I look GREAT!"  Yes, this is totally vanity, but it's vanity I worked really hard to be able to have about how I look.  It also involved no small amount of learning to dress myself properly and to change how I felt about certain aspects of my body.  (For example, I have large thighs.  Large thighs that carried me through a half marathon over the weekend, so who cares if a mermaid dress wasn't in the cards for me.)

How do you feel about TTD sessions? Are you doing one? Why or why not?


  1. I love seeing other people's TTD sessions and think the photography and artistry is beautiful. But I doubt I'll do one myself. I don't mind having my picture taken but I'm not sure what I would do with the pictures afterwards. I doubt I'd hang them up, as I'd be more likely to want to hang up our actual wedding photos. For me I don't see the point, but I love seeing other people's shots! Looking forward to seeing yours :o)

  2. haha it's about to be our 4 year anniversary, and i still want to shoot a trash the dress :)

  3. Hmmmm. Never really thought much about a Trash the Dress session, to be honest. I know what they are, obviously, and I can appreciate great shots as much as the next person. Now that I'm thinking about it, I really enjoy the image of the (former) beautiful, look-but-don't-touch bride taking the (former) beautiful, look-but-don't-touch dress, and bringing it back down to reality, if that makes sense.

    That being said, no, I'm not doing one. We're one of those people who didn't have engagement photos taken either. I'm 100% certain that I won't know what to do with all of the photos from the wedding, much less an extra set of the two of us, much less an extra set of just me. I'll probably end up donating my dress after the wedding as well, and it'd be just my luck that there'd be some stubborn stain on it that I wouldn't be able to get out!

  4. Oh man, I WISH I could bring myself to do a TTD session. I love, love, love wedding pictures in the ocean, and it would be perfect for our wedding to do one. But alas, I love wedding dresses too much to ruin one. I thought about buying a cheap dress just for the pix, but I can't really waste the money, especially when we're already on a budget. But I fully intend to live vicariously through you!

  5. Well said! I feel the same way about a boudoir fiance isn't in to lingerie (he prefers nothing at all) and he told me that he had no idea what he'd do with the pictures...but I still want one, for me.

  6. My fiance wants me to do one for our first year anniversary :) so im like...heck, why not? It will be awesome! He will be in the shoot too and Im going to wear my actual wedding dress...scary right? But nothing we do will be something a little drycleaning cant fix :)
    You are right- it is an opportunity to be creative, and probably a chance to do something most of us will never have otherwise. So go for it!

  7. I spent this whole post trying to figure out what TTD stood for. Ha!

    I so want to do an engagement session because I want good normal(ish) photos of us. The boy thinks it's a waste. Still trying to figure out if we have the chickens for it.

  8. Honestly I hate the term Trash the Dress, and yes, it does conjure up images of out of control vain women (this is the fault of the WIC). But After Wedding Shoot seems nice and sentimental. And I know you are not one of those women. So I'll just refrain from that specific term for the purposes of this comment.

    I think you should do it, if you can get an after wedding shoot instead of the engagement pics.

    I actually model for fun, well I used to but not so much now that I'm in grad school. I have no where close to a models body, but I'm bendy and can pose like a dancer (used to dance for a long time) so photographers seem to like to do creative shoots with me. And that's what why I think it seems perfectly reasonable to do a creative shoot with a photographer in your wedding dress. I do it in my real life for fun, so you might as well do it after your wedding for fun. I think you'll have a blast.

  9. In theory I like them. Some of the pictures are awesome and incredibly creative. Personally, I can't do it. I think it's so sad to ruin a perfectly fine dress regardless of the cost.

    I hope to do a wear-it-again shoot only because we couldn't get the photog I really wanted for the wedding he's booked)so we'll take shots after.