Saturday, June 19, 2010

Wedding Wisdom and a Real Wedding: Proposals

A Los Angeles Love talked recently about proposals and not needing to hire somebody to plan it for you (or to photograph it, but I do still think that is kinda cool.)

Anyway, she said this about proposals in the comments, and I thought it was really very true:

"The proposal is icing on the relationship cake and a chance to express how much we love each other, not a chance to buy a lot of expensive services in an attempt to make it special and important."

I will say this about public proposals and about having pictures of them:
Meet my friends, Mike and Stacy, who got engaged after he took her skydiving for her birthday. (They're getting married today and you'll get to see their amazing invites shortly as well!) I love this picture because it is very very them, and I love that their friends get to feel let in on the proposal, but my favorite part of the story was told to us later, and I hope I'm retelling it properly. Stacy was nervous as they were about to actually make the jump, and Mike went first. Right before he went, he showed her the ring box, then jumped. I think that's a pretty good reason to go out of a plane :).

So yeah, pictures are great.  But they can't ever capture everything.

Also, a lot of people have said that proposals are such a private moment and why would you want people to watch you?  Can somebody please explain the difference between that and having a ceremony?  Thanks!


  1. What a fun proposal! Thanks for sharing

  2. HAHA! He showed her the ring box first THEN jumped?! Gnarly!

    Josh is WAY more private than I am. So when he decided to propose, he did it in a way he felt comfortable- it was in our home, it was just us two, and it was sweet. Very him.

    Me? At 16 I saw a guy propose to his gal at the Natural History Museum on a busy Saturday. It was awesome! And it definitely made an impression on me even 11 years ago.

    Ceremonies are very intimate and special, but I think most of us understand that people will be watching. And if we don't like it, we can change that- elope, keep it small, etc. And it's weird b/c although I always wanted the big, public proposal... I don't our ceremony to be so intimate. We're planning to do a Yichud and I plan to take that time to say my own vows to Josh.

    But I totally get what you're saying- I think it depends on the couple and how much they want to share or not.

    Good question, though!

  3. Interesting article! thanks for sharing it!

  4. I think the proposal is a very intimate thing...ours was very very private and I loved it for that reason (and others!). Our ceremony will be attended by our nearest and dearest because the act of getting married (in my humble opinion) is a public commitment. Wedding ceremonies are the act of committing to each other forever in front of your community. They are not only promises that you are making to each other, but also to your families.

  5. To me, the ceremony and really the whole wedding is not about you as a couple. It's about publicly expressing your desire to spend your life together, basically shouting it to the world.

    The proposal is about you. It's about the two of you showing your devotion to each other and desire to spend your life together as a couple. It's personal, and you don't have to take anybody else into account. The wedding is a show.

    That's how I feel anyway. And yes, I'm a little bitter about how little the wedding is about the two of you at the moment.

  6. Great post. I agree with the other ladies too. Our proposal was very private, we were able to share it with people once immediately but in the moment, it was just the 2 of us. Perfect.

    oh & I LOL'd at "I think that's a pretty good reason to go out of a plane" HAH! Agreed!

  7. Yes, you retold it correctly! What a fun surprise to find this on your blog! :-) Thank you!!!

  8. What an awesome proposal! I know I wouldn't even have been able to enjoy my skydiving moment because I would be so buy freaking out about what was about to happen at the bottom.